The Admission Vulnerability
by ScienceGeekMom
Summary: Season 8: MAJOR SPOILERS from The Prom Equivalency (Episode 8). What happens next after such a major event in Sheldon's and Amy's lives - there are hurdles to navigate - wires are crossed and confusion ensues. (My first fan-fiction) I own nothing of the Big Bang theory characters, but thank Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady, whose property they are.
1. Plans

_AMY'S POV_

Still in her seafoam-colored prom dress, Amy twirled around and around in her apartment. It had been the best night of her life! She had had a real prom, with a real date – not one paid for by her mother. She felt beautiful and special. There had been all her friends, decorations, pictures, dancing … and romance. Never had she imagined that the night could be so romantic! "_Yes_," she once again wished she could tell her teenage self, "_It does get better!_"

But, best of all? Love! Sheldon had told her that he loved her! Out of the blue. Totally unexpected. Totally wonderful. _Sheldon loves me!_

Sure, the night started out rocky. It took so much hard work to get ready. There was shopping for the perfect dress, getting a manicure and pedicure and her hair done, and all that waxing – so much waxing. She had needed to take an analgesic! Boy, how did Penny ever do that for seven proms!? All that work and Sheldon had taken one look at her, freaked out and hidden in his room.

Discouraged, thinking that the prom was over before it even began for her, she had trudged back there to his room. What was his deal this time? With Sheldon, sometimes, who knew? Maybe he'd seen a spider on the wall or her dress had been asymmetrical in some fashion.

She had been going to leave and go to the prom herself. After all, that would be nothing new; in fact, it was still an improvement over her high school prom. But Sheldon emerged from his room and they had had a good talk. Sheldon told her that she looked pretty (_her, pretty_! _This night really was the best_) and admitted feeling pressured by the group's expectations about after-prom traditions. _What had everybody been telling Sheldon? Surely they knew better than to tease him about such things! No, I guess they always tease him about such things._

Amy was able to say that she didn't want him to feel pressured. Sure, she hoped for more – even Sheldon knew that – but she wanted his comfort more and there didn't have to be any expectations for that evening. Sheldon thanked her.

Then, she decided that she just had to tell him that she loved him. She didn't know why, exactly. He looked so handsome. He had told her that he thought she was pretty. They'd been able to be honest with each other. She had been bottling up her love for so long now and she just wanted to be able to say it to him, even if he didn't say it back.

But…she didn't even have to say it! Sheldon just said that he loved her too! He knew what she was going to say and he said it right back. _Oh, what a wonderful night! I love Sheldon. And Sheldon loves me!_

She couldn't wait to tell her bestie! Of course, that would have to wait until morning. Now all her friends were off having sex after the prom. _Maybe that would be me soon too! Maybe Sheldon and I will start to kiss more, maybe he would touch me…reach second base…kiss me where I've never been kissed before…_

Abruptly, Amy stopped spinning around as a realization hit her. The smile dropped off her face. She shook her head and put her hands up to her mouth. _What am I thinking? Of course none of those things will happen. This is the man who, when he asked me to be his girlfriend, said that absolutely nothing would change, physically or otherwise. He hates change!_

Amy sank down onto her couch, remembering how life was with Sheldon. _He "isn't a fan" of handholding._ _After we kissed on the train, he tried to break up with me – over a table! He yelled at me and ran away for weeks after I suggested being his roommate. Sure, everything was changing and he was overwhelmed by it all, so it wasn't just about me. But I know I was a part of it. He still wanted me out of his room tonight even after he told me he loved me._

Amy frowned as she thought it out more. _Sheldon is still getting his life back on track from his trip and all the changes in his work. This could again be the straw that breaks the camel's back. I can't tell anybody that he told me he loves me. I can't make this a big deal at all or expect any kind of progress in our relationship. Our friends would tease him; they would wind him up about coitus being the next step. That will just make mess everything up. _

Amy sighed. _I love him and I don't want him to freak out and break up with me. I need to be prepared for us to regress a little. I have to be very careful now. I can't ask for anything physical or emotional. I have to be as contained and undemanding as possible. I won't say "I love you" or bring up the topic again. Sheldon is a man who panics and runs. I'll back off. He isn't ready for this._

Amy nodded. She had a plan. It would all work out, as long as she was careful.

_SHELDON'S POV_

Sheldon looked at himself in the mirror as he slowly untied his bowtie. He had done it – he had told Amy that he loved her. His eyes looked bright and his face was flushed. _Maybe I should take my temperature? I could be catching something…or maybe I do have an alien parasite after all._

But he knew better.

He had been very anxious that night. Penny and Leonard had both told him that there were expectations about what one did after the prom. He wasn't ready for any of that. Perhaps Amy expected all that to happen. But….she knew him, right? Surely she wouldn't think he would suddenly and completely give in to his baser urges.

He tried to prepare himself for the prom. He gave himself a pep talk, got his flask of pomegranate juice ready and prepared to pretend that he was an alien in a strange land. However, all of his preparations were for naught when he saw Amy, looking beautiful in that dress. _What color was that dress any way? Blue? Green? Maybe Amy could tell him the RGB value._

Upon seeing her, he was immediately overwhelmed. He didn't feel like such a Homo Novus right then – those hormones that Leonard said he didn't have were rushing through his system. And some visions of what could be after the prom suddenly popped into his mind. Sheldon ran to his room.

But Amy came after him, as he has known she would. They talked and he was able to explain so that she wasn't hurt anymore. And he realized something. Yes, Amy hoped for more in their relationship, but she didn't expect more. He could work with that. Expectations came with so much pressure. Without the burden of expectations, he could move forward.

He felt so much better. It had been easy to tell her that he loved her. Of course, he'd known for some time that she loved him. He has also suspected for a long time that he felt the same for her, but had really determined that during his time away. That train trip had helped him realize many things – chiefly that he was more than just "very fond" of Amy. Indeed, he had to be honest to himself during his uninterrupted think time on the train. He liked kissing Amy and actually could imagine being more physically affectionate with her.

_Because I told her I loved her, would Amy suddenly want him to be all hippie-dippie? Will we kiss and touch more? Perhaps I could try this second base she keeps talking about? Are we headed to coitus?_

_Dear Lord! _ Sheldon started to hyperventilate a little and sat down on his bed. _No, I'm safe with Amy. _ She wouldn't hurt him. On his train trip, he had already decided to grow up, work to embrace some change, and move forward with her. It would be okay; he was not going to panic or run again. _And really, it doesn't sound so bad. Maybe not the hippie-dippie stuff or the coitus, but I am interested in the other things._

_But how does one go about initiating more physical affection? Do I just do what I want? No, I could never risk that. Do I just write an amendment in the Relationship Agreement? That seems too forward. What if she doesn't agree? And I could never actually write the words down._ Sheldon pondered for a few minutes. _Wait, I've got it!_

_I'll let AMY initiate the physical contact. Surely she'll be all lovey-dovey now that she knows I love her. Her ovaries will be squirting so much goofy juice into her system that she won't be able to keep herself from touching me. I'll allow those physical things to happen that I'm comfortable with and I'll shut down the rest. That's perfect – we'll move forward, Amy will initiate to make it easier for me, but I will control it._

Sheldon nodded. He had a plan. It would all work out, as long as he was careful.


	2. At the Movies

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you, everyone, who read and commented on the story. As this is my first fiction, I didn't realize the rush of emotion that I would feel knowing that people were reading and commenting on my work. Wow. Thank you.**

**If I spoiled the episode for you by my description of the story, I apologize. I struggled to find something that conveyed the sense of the story but didn't say what happened. I guess I didn't do that well enough - please forgive me.**

**I own nothing of "The Theory of Everything". All I know about it is what I've seen in previews. And I continue to own nothing of "The Big Bang Theory."**

* * *

><p>It was Friday night and the four couples stood in the lobby of the movie theater, waiting in line to buy their snacks. They were getting ready to see the new movie "The Theory of Everything" about noted scientist Stephen Hawking.<p>

"Wow, Sheldon, you must be pretty eager to see this movie, if you were willing to give up Vintage Video Game Night for it," said Howard. "Shouldn't you be freaking out or having a meltdown or something?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "Well, we wouldn't have had to miss Vintage Video Game Night if you all have been willing to forgo the opening night and wait until the next 'Anything Can Happen Thursday'! Anyway, Howard, you know that this movie is about my dear friend and, as such, I can make certain allowances."

"_Dear_ friend? Just because you met Stephen Hawking once and fainted in front of him doesn't make you his _dear_ friend. I'm the one that worked with him!"

"Hey, I'm the one that went on his North Sea expedition. I've worked with him too!" interjected Leonard.

"Leonard, Leonard" patronized Sheldon. "Hawking wasn't even on that boat. Unlike me, you've never met personally him. I play _Words with Friends_ with him. Friends! You only play that game with friends."

Raj smirked. "Dude, don't forget that you drunk-dialed him too. Repeatedly. Is that something you do with 'friends'? That was pretty funny."

Sheldon started to twitch and Penny decided to intervene. "Okay, everyone – that's enough. You are all Stephen Hawking's friends. Now, what I want to know is – why am I going to this science movie that I won't understand when I could be seeing the most recent Melissa McCarthy movie?"

Leonard smiled and gave her a hug. "Oh, Penny, I think you are really going to be surprised by this movie. It's not a 'science movie'."

"Yea, Penny," Bernadette said. "This is a love story. This movie is all about Stephen Hawking and his wife – how they met and fell in love, the tragedy that is his illness, and the harshness and struggles it brought to their marriage." She looked over at Howard and reached for his hand.

"Oh, it's going to be sooo romantic" moaned Raj. "I hope I brought enough tissues." Emily pressed up close against him and gave him a smile.

Amy noticed all the couples' expressions of affection, but gave no outward sign. She turned to Sheldon, careful to keep some distance between them. "Don't worry, Sheldon. I'm sure that there will be plenty about Hawking's science discoveries for us to appreciate."

"Thank you, Amy. I am gratified that your priorities are properly focused."

Contrary to what his words implied, Sheldon had fully realized that this movie was a love story rather than a documentary and he was not concerned about it in the slightest. If he had to watch a hippy-dippy love story, at least watching one about his scientific mentor was the way to do it. "_And_" Sheldon thought, "_this is the perfect setting to begin our gradual increase in physical affection._"

In fact, Sheldon had been reflecting on just this idea for several days. He and Amy would certainly not be engaging in inappropriate public displays of affection in the lobby, like the handsy other couples. But in a darkened movie theater, where people's attention was on the screen, he could perhaps try something a little different.

Amy always demanded that they hold hands during movies. In the past he had told her that he wasn't a fan of the activity. Today, though, he thought that he might just tell her that, and when she looked crestfallen (as she usually did when he said that), he would smile at her and slide his arm around her shoulders instead. He grinned, imagining her delighted reaction and the loving, shocked look that would appear on her face. _Oh, yes – we really do have the best relationship. Do I know my woman, or what?_

While Sheldon had been daydreaming, they had moved forward in the line and he heard Amy order a large tub of popcorn with lots of butter and a large soda.

"Amy, that's not your usual order!"

"Yes, Sheldon, I know. I am just very hungry tonight." Amy was thinking that she needed her hands full so that she would have an excuse not to hold Sheldon's hand. As much as she loved holding hands with Sheldon, she knew that it wasn't his favorite activity. Amy felt that this would be a perfect opportunity to give him some space, thus reassuring him that nothing was going to get out of hand after their expressions of love to each other.

Snacks purchased, the couples entered the theatre, Sheldon "hawing" loudly to find the perfect acoustic sweet spot. The other patrons looked at him askance and Penny rolled her eyes. "Do we have to go through this every time?

Amy answered, "He just wants us to have the best possible viewing. He's being picky for us all. That's just another something that I lo…I appreciate about him." _Whew, close call._ Penny looked at her strangely for a moment and Amy looked back implacably. Penny shrugged and went over to sit with Leonard.

* * *

><p>As the movie started, Sheldon looked over at Amy. She had the big tub of popcorn in her lap and was picking at it with the hand nearest to him, while her soda was in the cupholder on her other side. Amy noticed Sheldon looking at her hand with a raised eyebrow.<p>

"Sheldon, you are safe tonight from hand-holding." Amy giggled. "I know you don't like it and my hand is all buttery from the popcorn anyway."

Sheldon masked his disappointment behind his usual stony countenance. "Amy, I commend you on your hygiene sense."

* * *

><p>Partway through the movie, Hawking's wife-to-be professed her love for him and said that she would stay by his side no matter how his illness progressed. Knowing Hawking and exactly what that his illness had brought, Sheldon realized what an enormous promise that was and found himself surprisingly moved by the declaration.<p>

_Is this what love means? I have declared my love to Amy. Do we have that kind of love? Would I stay with Amy if she had such an illness? Would she stay by my side no matter what? I think so; I really do. I cannot imagine my life without her; she is a new origin for me (0,0,0,0). I really do love her._

Sheldon looked over at Amy to see her looking at him with a funny look on her face. As much as he was learning her different facial expressions, he didn't quite recognize this one. _Was her stomach upset from all that popcorn? Did she need to get out to go to the bathroom?_ He desperately hoped that she wouldn't be ill on him.

As he got ready to ask her what was wrong, Amy smiled at him. A beautiful, wide smile that lit up her eyes. Sheldon held his breath, amazed. He leaned toward her, lifting up his arm, not sure why, but knowing that he wanted to reach out to bring her to him. He prepared to slide his arm around her back.

Just then Emily tapped on Amy's shoulder, calling Amy's attention away. "Amy, you are spilling your soda." Amy gasped in horror and began to mop up the mess. Sheldon frowned – his arm was just hanging out in the air with nowhere to go. He hurriedly stretched, trying to make the action look intentional, and then placed his hand back in his lap. "_This isn't going to work. Perhaps later tonight we can have an unscheduled goodnight kiss…."_

* * *

><p>The couples left the theater discussing the movie. However Amy was quiet, reflecting on the movie and on what had happened. <em>Did we have a moment there? Was Sheldon actually moved by the love between Hawking and his girlfriend?<em>

Penny squeezed Leonard's hand. "You were right, honey. I really did love that movie."

Leonard smiled. "I thought you might. That movie was a wonderful blend between the romantic and science."

Bernadette and Howard looked at each other. Bernadette started, "For better, for worse…" "In sickness and in health…" continued Howard. "Til death do we part", they said in unison and kissed sweetly.

Raj, who had been finally calming down after the movie, started sobbing anew and wiped his eyes, sniffing and blowing his nose on yet another tissue. Emily sighed, but pulled another packet of tissues out of her purse and handed them to Raj. Sheldon frowned at them.

"I, for one, am unhappy about how the science was portrayed in this movie, " proclaimed Sheldon. "His concept of imaginary time was not discussed at all, and his thoughts on the unification theory were so dumbed down that even Howard, with just his master's degree, could understand it!"

Howard jerked around. "At least I could understand the romance and the beauty in the movie. You know, Sheldon, Stephan Hawking loved a woman. He had sex with her and they had children. Now he communicates through a robotic interface, but he is nowhere near as robotic as you are. And I don't mean that as a compliment to you!"

Sheldon glared at him as the others gasped. Amy said, "That is unfair, Howard, and I think you need to apologize. Sheldon is not a robot!"

Bernadette, radiating anger, squeaked, "Sheldon needs to apologize first. Howard has the terminal degree in his field and Sheldon needs to stop making fun of him!"

"I refuse to apologize for speaking the truth."

"I also refuse to apologize for speaking the truth."

Emily whispered to Raj, "Now the evening is finally getting interesting! Do you think anyone will draw blood?"

Emily smiled a feral grin. Amy and Bernadette were glaring at each other, while Howard and Sheldon tried to blow up each others' minds. Penny whispered to Leonard. "I don't want another repeat of being sent to the emergency room by Amy's handbag of death. You handle this."

Leonard stepped up. "All right, everyone. Let's settle down, go home and relax. Come on, Sheldon – you rode here with Penny and me. Let's go."

Sheldon was seething. _I am not an emotionless robot. The fact that Howard believes that only shows how mentally deficient is really is! _He stomped over to Amy, while everyone separated to their cars.

"Sheldon, I know you aren't a robot. Howard is being a jerk. Don't worry about what he thinks."

"Thank you, Amy. I am sorry that the evening has ended on such a note. Perhaps to make up for it, we could visit the zoo tomorrow."

"I would like that very much, Sheldon. Shall I pick you up at 10?"

"Yes, that will be sufficient. Thank you." Sheldon looked at Amy and was reminded of their moment in the movie theater. She had that same look and was smiling at him. He leaned toward her, thinking that he could give her a quick kiss goodnight that no one would notice. But Leonard called out to him "Aren't you coming, Sheldon?"

Sheldon straightened. "Yes, of course, Leonard. Good night, Amy." _It's a good thing we'll be alone tomorrow._


	3. At the Zoo

Amy awoke on Saturday morning full of the events of the previous evening. She was still angry with Howard, but more pressingly was thinking about the moments that seemed to have happened between Sheldon and herself. _I think backing off is working. He doesn't seem like he is going to run away. In fact, it felt for a second there like Sheldon was going to kiss me at the end of the evening. No….probably not. It wasn't an official date night, after all. But, so far, so good! And he asked me to the zoo today!_

Amy dressed for the zoo with great care. They would do a great deal of walking, so she certainly needed her sensible walking shoes. However, now that she had heard Sheldon say that he thought she was pretty, Amy wanted to look nicer than usual. The problem was that she wasn't entirely sure what Sheldon liked – he had never commented on her appearance before except to tell her that her lip-gloss looked too slippery. In the end, Amy decided not to wear tights and even left off her cardigan, opting instead for a light jacket. She only hoped Sheldon would find it appealing.

* * *

><p>Sheldon was finishing his last minute preparations of his own. He checked his wallet and grabbed his windbreaker as Leonard came through the apartment door.<p>

"Hot date, huh, Sheldon?" asked Leonard.

"Of course not, Leonard. It is a bit chilly today – that is why I have my windbreaker."

"No, Sheldon, that's not what I…oh, forget it. You and Amy have a great time."

"Oh, we intend to. On our last gift-giving occasion, Amy surprised me with a zoo adoption of one of the koalas. Of course, the gift confers no actual ownership to me, as it acts merely as a donation for the conservation program for the koalas, but I do have my koala's picture and I like to think that the little guy and I have a special relationship. I've named him 'Stephen'. When I visit, Stephen always moves closer to the bars and puts on a particularly cute face for me." Sheldon smiled his koala smile.

Leonard chuckled. "Well, I guess that makes sense. With your no-sex relationship, I guess you and Amy would have to adopt to make your family complete."

Sheldon gave a start and then glared at Leonard. As Leonard headed back to his room, there was a knock on the door. Sheldon shook his head and then went to answer it. _Good – it's Amy._ "Good job, Amy. Right on time as usual."

"Of course, Sheldon."

Sheldon looked closely at Amy. She looked different today. _Where is her cardigan? Her tights?_ His breath caught. _She's so lovely, it scares me. But it will be okay. Relax. I love her and I want to get closer to her. Relax._ "Amy, you look...umm…underdressed. Are you sure you aren't going to be too cold?"

_What else did I expect?_ Shrugging off her disappointment, Amy said, "No, I'm sure I'll be fine. Let's get going, shall we?" Sheldon nodded and escorted her out the door.

As they walked down the stairs, Sheldon turned to Amy and smiled. "So, Amy, are you prepared for a wonderful time at the zoo today?"

"Absolutely. Let's go see the koalas first. I know they are your favorite. And you must be wanting to seeing Stephen."

"No, Amy. My Meemaw always says 'Ladies first.' And you are my lady. We should go see the monkeys. I want today to be special for you too."

Amy beamed with joy. "Oh, Sheldon. I love y…um…your little koala. Don't worry – I'm sure we'll have time to visit both Stephen and the monkeys." _Phew, that was a close one, Fowler. You've got to be more careful. Watch what you say._

* * *

><p>At the zoo, they went straight to the koala enclosure. As they got there, though, Sheldon didn't have his usual delighted expression on his face. In fact, he seemed strangely distant.<p>

Amy was concerned. "Sheldon, what's wrong? You seem so distracted."

"I am just frustrated with Leonard. Can you believe that this morning he told me that Stephen is likely the only child I will have?"

Amy was appalled at Leonard's joking. She said vehemently, "Why would he say that? You are a remarkable man and you will gift humanity with your progeny some day. Leonard fears that Penny will never want to have the babies that he wants so badly. I'm sure you won't have to worry about that." She stopped there, fearing that she had revealed more than she wanted.

Sheldon was both taken aback and greatly pleased with her defense. He reached out and took Amy's hand. "Thank you," he said, giving her hand a little squeeze.

Sheldon continued, "Of course, other than intellectually, Leonard is an inferior breeding partner. He is below average height and severely lactose-intolerant – no child should have to forgo ice cream!"

"Uh huh," murmured Amy, far more interested in the fact that Sheldon was still holding her hand than worrying about how gassy Leonard's children would be when they ate dairy.

"Oh, look, there's Stephen," cried Sheldon.

"Where?"

"Over there!" Sheldon released Amy's hand and turned her around. He put one hand on her shoulder and pointed over her other shoulder with his other hand. "Just follow my line of sight."

Suddenly both Sheldon and Amy realized how closely they stood together. Amy's back was nestled right up against Sheldon's chest; she could feel his every breath. Sheldon's face was near her hair; he could smell the intoxicating scent that was Amy – all soap and dandruff shampoo – everything nice and clean. He let out a deep breath and Amy shivered.

"Are you cold? You don't have as many layers on as usual." Sheldon lowered his hands to her upper arms, rubbing her gently. Amy didn't respond; she just nestled back against him more firmly. Sheldon caught his breath; he could feel her every curve and it was causing his stomach to do loop-de-loops. Desperately he looked for something to say.

"You know," whispered Sheldon, "Stephen is an adult koala. The mating season will be coming soon and I believe he, unlike Leonard, will be an ideal mate."

"Why is that?" murmured Amy.

"Look at how tall he is compared to the other males. Females are attracted to that quality."

Amy nodded.

"Koalas possess an extra pair of vocal folds outside their larynx – a special sound-making organ that no other animal has. When the time comes, the male will make a special guttural, reverberating call." Sheldon's voice dropped into a deeper register. "The lower the frequency, the bigger and better mate the male koala is. Male koalas can make a sound so low-pitched, it should only be able to come from an animal the size of an elephant."

Amy desperately wanted to turn around to look at Sheldon, but was afraid to break the spell.

"The female koala is much smaller than the male koala. The females tend to be very shy, but the male has to wait for her to respond after he initiates relations with his sounds and scent-marking. But the female can clearly recognize the smell and sound of a male. Once she makes herself known, the male approaches her."

Amy was getting light-headed, forgetting to breath. Sheldon stopped rubbing her arms and instead put his arms around Amy's stomach, caressing gently.

"The male koala bites the female on the back of her neck to make sure that she knows she is his." Sheldon's breath brushed over the back of her neck. "And then…they mate."

Amy jumped. She had never heard anything so erotic in her entire life. She took in a deep breath, awash in the talc scent that was Sheldon. Slowly Amy turned in his arms, looking into his dark, dilated eyes. She opened her mouth. "Sheldon, I want … I love … I, uh…"

Amy shook her head, shaking off her trance like a wet dog shaking off water, trying to form a coherent thought. She looked around and saw all the people milling around them. What she wanted was to knock Sheldon over with passionate kisses and declarations of her love. But this place was just so public. She sighed, "Sheldon, I want you to know how much I love all the knowledge you have. It is truly remarkable."

Sheldon dropped his arms to his sides. _Really? That is what she wanted to say?_ Sheldon surprised himself by how disappointed he was. He had hoped for something else from a sentence that started "I want…" or "I love…" "Ah…thank you, Amy. Perhaps it is time to move on to the monkeys, now? I imagine it will be warmer by their enclosure."

Although Amy hadn't felt cold before, she was suddenly chilled by the removal of Sheldon's arms. "Okay."

* * *

><p>They walked through the rest of the zoo, both of them distracted and paying the exhibits far less attention than usual. Sheldon didn't try to touch Amy again, although he did grudgingly loan her his jacket when the weather turned cooler after lunch. Amy didn't gush over the monkeys as usual. Soon it was time to return home so that Sheldon could begin his prevening laundry preparations.<p>

Amy pulled up to Sheldon's apartment. "Thank you, Sheldon, for a lovely day."

Sheldon looked at her closely. _Did I really have an overwhelming urge to bite her on the neck? _ Amy stared into his eyes. _Was I really so overwhelmed with lust that I nearly accosted my boyfriend in a crowded public place?_

Sheldon cleared this throat and broke the silence. "Would you like to come up, Amy? You could help me sort my clothes and we could play Counterfactuals while the laundry is going."

Amy nodded and turned off her car. "Thank you, Sheldon. I would like that very much."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Never thought I could find such a cuddly animal sexy! As always, I would love to hear your thoughts.**


	4. Laundry Night - presorting

As they walked up the stairs, Amy's head was swimming. _Sheldon has never invited me in on a Laundry Night. Is this about what happened at the zoo today? Is everything okay? I can't decide whether to be thrilled or worried._

Sheldon was distracted as well. _Why did I invite Amy for Laundry Night? What was I thinking? This is my special, alone time. But I just couldn't let her drive away from me tonight. Clearly I'm turning into a hippy – enslaved to a hotsie totsie from Glendale!"_

As Sheldon began to unlock his door, Penny popped her head out of her apartment. "Amy, just the person I was waiting for! Could you come over and have some girl time?"

"Well…um…," said Amy. She looked at Sheldon, a question on her face. Sheldon turned to Penny. "Penny, we were just going to get my laundry underway. You are delaying my evening schedule – I am already a few minutes late for sorting."

Penny came over and grabbed Amy's hand. "Sheldon, I won't keep her all night," Penny huffed. "You do laundry every week; you don't need Amy's help with that. I'll return her after we've had some time to talk." She pulled Amy back to her apartment. Amy looked over her shoulder at Sheldon, gave a little shrug and smile and allowed Penny to pull her into the apartment.

* * *

><p>As Penny and Amy entered, Leonard stood up. "Hi, Amy – good to see you. How was the zoo?"<p>

"It was very nice, Leonard. Thank you."

Penny went over and gave Leonard a hug. "Honey, I know we were going to watch a movie, but I could use some girl time alone with Amy. Would you mind giving us some space?"

He smiled at her lovingly. "Of course. Anything you need. Why don't I go over and bother Sheldon for a bit?"

"That would be perfect, Leonard. Thanks so much." She leaned over and gave him a tender kiss. "I love you."

"Love you too." Leonard beamed. "Let me know when you are ready to watch the movie. Later, Amy."

"Bye, Leonard"

Amy sat down at the kitchen counter while Penny poured two glasses of wine. "Amy, I'm sorry to interrupt your time with Sheldon, but I have been wanting to talk to you for a week and didn't want it to wait too long."

"Why? What's up?"

"I am afraid that Leonard and I owe you an apology. It turns out that we both took the opportunity to tease Sheldon about how everybody has sex after their prom. We got him all riled up and that's the reason he went all whack-a-doodle on you and freaked out."

"I see. That does explain some of what he said."

"I'm sooo sorry. Please forgive us. We really didn't mean to ruin your prom or make things difficult between you two."

"You mean more difficult than usual?" mumbled Amy under her breath. "Don't worry about it, bestie. I could never be angry with you."

"Thank you, Amy. So…is everything okay between you and Sheldon? Did we mess up everything? You two did look pretty happy dancing together."

Amy debated about what she wanted to tell Penny. She had originally decided to keep everything quiet for awhile, but the temptation to spill everything to her bestie and get her guidance was overwhelming.

"Oh, Penny. It was the best night of my life. Sheldon told me that he loved me."

Penny choked on her wine. "Seriously? Our Sheldon? The man who wants to be a robot? And you are just now telling me about it?"

"Well, yes. It was so wonderful when he told me, but I don't want to make a big deal out of it."

"How can you not make a big deal out of it? This is huge!"

"Penny – Sheldon is a flight risk. For every step forward he takes, he tries to slide backwards. The guys will tease him and he'll panic and Leonard will buy a new piece of furniture and Sheldon will break up with me."

"Amy. Do you think he's still like that? Sheldon is making so many changes in his work and he's doing okay with it. And he said that he loves you! Voluntarily! Has he looked like he's running away? Has he taken it back?"

Amy shook her head.

"Then it sounds like he really is trying to accept new things," concluded Penny.

"I suppose. Why is this so hard, though? You and Leonard have such a beautiful, easygoing love. I wish I could be as sure in my love as you both are."

"You think our love is easy? With all the mistakes we both made? Leonard and I had all these stops and starts before we got this to work. I worry that we don't have anything in common. I worry that he'll finally wake up and realize I'm stupid. He worries about guys hitting on me or not being enough for me. Our love isn't easy, Amy. Love never is. You and Sheldon are made for each other and he's now admitting it. I think that that is something you have to celebrate with him, not hide away from."

Amy thought for bit. _Penny's right. I've been so busy worrying about what could go wrong that I haven't gotten to enjoy our love at all. If I can't enjoy it – if I have to hide from it all the time – what is the point? I need to go over there right now and happily tell him that I love him._

Amy stood up. "Penny, thank you for the talk. I think it's time that I headed back over to Sheldon."

Penny gave her a hug. "Of course, sweetie. Good luck."

* * *

><p>After Amy disappeared into Penny's apartment, Sheldon entered his own, putting his things away and heading to his room to get his laundry. But, as he passed his spot on the couch, Sheldon stopped and sat down instead.<p>

_I was closer today to Amy than I've ever been before. And it wasn't scary or difficult. It was – I can admit only to myself – exhilarating. She smelled wonderful and I wanted to touch her. All right…yes…maybe even more than touch her. Perhaps next I can…"_

Just then, Leonard came in through the door and saw the physicist sitting alone on the couch. "Hey, Sheldon, are you okay? What are you doing sitting there? Shouldn't you be sorting your laundry?"

Sheldon started. "Leonard, I am thinking – surely something even you experimental physicists do occasionally."

Leonard rolled his eyes. "Well, then, don't let me stop you." He walked over to his desk and got out his laptop. "By the way, your girlfriend is over at Penny's. I got kicked out because they need to have some girl time. Did you do something wrong?"

Sheldon snorted. "Of course not, Leonard. Why would you think that?"

"Probably because she's over there and you're over here. It seemed clear that they had something important to discuss."

"Leonard, Leonard, Leonard," replied Sheldon, shaking his head haughtily. "Unlike you and Penny, our love does not require us to constantly dance attendance upon one another."

Leonard whipped around so quickly that he nearly fell off his desk chair. "Did you say 'love'?"

"Certainly, Leonard. Isn't it obvious? I have been contemplating my relationship with Amy for some time now. While I considered at one time that my feelings must be due to a brain parasite, upon closer reflection I realized that I do feel something very deeply for her. On the night of the prom, I informed Amy of my feelings of love towards her."

Leonard beamed, leaving his desk and coming over to stand beside the sofa. "Buddy, I am so happy for you and so proud of you. This is a great step you've taken in your relationship. I'm sure that Amy must have been so happy. How did it feel when she told you that she loved you? I don't think I've ever been as happy as when Penny finally said those words to me."

Sheldon frowned. "Actually, Leonard, I hadn't really thought about it, but Amy didn't exactly say that she loved me. I just presumed that she did."

Leonard blinked. "Wait…I just assumed that she told you first and then you told her afterward. She didn't said 'I love you'? What actually happened?"

"Well…let's see…If you recall, I was compelled to go to my room after you so wrongly misidentified the location of the upper flurmen. What were you thinking, anyway, to make such an obvious mistake?"

"I don't know, Sheldon. I'm sorry. Just go on."

"Anyway, Amy followed me. We talked and she seemed to understand what I was upset about. Then she told me that she had something to tell me. It was clearly something very difficult to say and she was struggling with it. It was obvious to me that she was going to tell me that she loved me, so I just decided to go ahead and tell her that I loved her too."

"So she didn't actually tell you whatever it was that she was trying to tell you."

Sheldon was starting to get a little nervous now. "No."

"What happened next?"

"She…um…well…she…um…she had a panic attack," Sheldon admitted reluctantly.

Leonard sucked in a deep breath and sat down in his armchair. He leaned close over to Sheldon and said gently, "Buddy, you know that that isn't good, don't you?"

Sheldon hadn't really given it any real thought before. But, now, under Leonard's pitying gaze, he realized that maybe he had misinterpreted everything. Sheldon nodded.

"And she hasn't said 'I love you' even once since then, right?"

Sheldon clasped his hands together and bowed his head. He looked like a man beaten down. Slowly he shook his head.

Leonard sighed. "I'm sure that everything's okay, buddy. But I think you'd better talk to Amy."

Sheldon jumped up, agitated. "How can this be okay, Leonard? If Amy were happy with my affection, surely she would have told Penny and then Penny would have gossiped to you. But you didn't know about it! And Amy is over there now with your fiancée talking about Lord knows what! Maybe right now Penny is helping her figure out the best way to break up with me!"

Sheldon continued to pace around the apartment while Leonard watched with concern. _Amy hasn't said, "I love you." On Friday at the movies, she hadn't wanted to hold my hand like usual. Today at the zoo, everything was really awkward after I embraced her at the koala enclosure. She must not be happy that I told her I loved her. I was so sure that she loved me; how could I be so wrong? It is these hippy dippy emotions that are playing havoc with my judgment. Maybe this always has to happen – a man makes himself vulnerable and the woman backs out of the relationship. It happened to Leonard. It happened to Howard before his wedding. I should have seen this coming. Maybe she was even trying to break up with me on prom night, but hasn't told me yet because she feels sorry for me. Oh…this is a disaster!_

"Calm down, Sheldon. Maybe you should go work on your laundry for awhile."

"I'm sorry, Leonard. I can't calm down. I must deal with this now."

Sheldon grabbed his iPad, brought up the Relationship Agreement on the screen, and headed over to the door with Leonard on his heels. As he opened it, he saw Amy coming out of Penny's apartment. The two of them met in the middle.

"We need to talk," they both said in unison.


	5. Laundry Night - the Conclusion

"We need to talk," they both said in unison.

Sheldon and Amy look at each other in surprise. Sheldon gave a quick, curt nod and turned back to his apartment with Amy following on his heels.

When they got in the apartment, Sheldon looked down at the Relationship Agreement on the iPad in his hand. Perhaps he wouldn't need it after all; he could hope. He surreptitiously set the iPad down on his desk and headed into the kitchen. "Would you like a beverage, Amy? Perhaps a chamomile tea?"

Sheldon's offer of chamomile tea was a bit concerning, given that Sheldon saw chamomile tea as a comforting beverage that one needed in times of stress or sorrow. Amy walked over to the kitchen island and sat on one of the stools.

"No, thank you, Sheldon. Perhaps we should just talk."

Sheldon walked around to her side of the island. "All right, Amy. I find myself in a quandary."

"How so?"

Sheldon began pacing around with agitation. "It has come to my attention that when one expresses a certain regard towards another person, it is usually anticipated that the other person will … If the anticipated expression is not received, logic dictates that their association may be lacking...that is…it is unsatisfying to be uncertain of the situation…social protocol dictates that both partners understand the circumstances…You haven't…I don't know if you…."

Amy tried to parse Sheldon's ramblings. _Is he about our relationship? It almost sounds like he needs to be reassured._

"Sheldon, I don't understand. You do know that I lo…." She stepped toward him and her eye fell on the iPad sitting on Sheldon's desk. The Relationship Agreement was open on it! _Wait – he had had that in his hand when we met out in the hallway! Oh, no. No way! We are __not__ doing this again!_

Amy's head jerked up and she glared at Sheldon. "Sheldon, you're breaking up with me again, aren't you? How can you keep casually discarding what we have? I thought you loved me. I cannot stand here and try to hang onto us yet again. That's it – I'm done." Amy turned and marched toward the door, tears blurring her vision and holding back her sobs. _I wanted this to be wonderful – I really hoped. But I knew it was too good to be true._

Sheldon looked after her, frozen in place. He was appalled – both with her conclusion and the pain with which she spoke. This wasn't what he anticipated her thinking. _I'm not leaving her. I'm not ever leaving her again!_

_"So go after her, stupid!"_ his brain shouted at him.

Sheldon ran to the door and ripped it open. Amy was hurrying down the stairs. He rushed down after her and grabbed her by the shoulders. When he turned her around, he saw the tears running down her face.

"No, Amy. You don't understand. I'm not breaking up with you. Please come back upstairs."

Amy shook her head. She almost didn't seem to understand him. "No, no," she mumbled through her tears.

"Come upstairs, Amy," said Sheldon tenderly, leading her up the stairs with a hand on her back. "Come on. It's okay. You'll see."

They got up the stairs and re-entered Sheldon's apartment. Sheldon led her over to the sofa and sat her down, handing her the Rubik's cube tissue box. "Please stay, Amy." He went over to the kitchen and took down the cups to make some tea.

Amy blew her nose and cleared her throat. "Sheldon, I saw the Relationship Agreement open on your iPad. The only reason you'd have that up, carrying the iPad around with you, is to break up with me. If you want me to stay, then you need to explain this to me."

Sheldon abandoned the cups, went over to his desk and picked up the iPad. "Amy, you are such an intelligent woman, but sometimes your hormones and emotions get the better of you. Plus your field of study doesn't lend itself to the logical reasoning that physics clearly does. Your analysis, in this case, is faulty. The termination notice is not the only portion of the Relationship Agreement that I might have ready for a discussion with you."

He continued, "I wasn't sure that I was ready to show this to you, but I think it is now necessary. In light of the recent changes in our relationship, I've been working on an amendment to the Relationship Agreement."

Sheldon sat down and held out the iPad. Amy started to read.

**_Appendix A_**

**_The Physical Affection Expression Chart_**

**The purpose of this appendix and chart is to ensure that the progression of expressions of physical affection between the Boyfriend and the Girlfriend proceed at a measured pace, approved by both parties. Individual expressions of affection will be identified and will go through a screening process, beginning with a determination of the Boyfriend's and Girlfriend's willingness to engage in each expression.**

**Once willingness for a certain expression is officially indicated in writing by both the Boyfriend and Girlfriend, the expression will enter a period of time, hereafter to be known as the "Trial Period". During the Trial Period, the expression is to be repeated a total of 10 times. Only those expressions for which ****both**** the Boyfriend and Girlfriend have ****previously**** indicated willingness on the written chart may enter the Trial Period. **

**After the 10****th**** iteration, the Trial Period for the expression is completed. At that time, the Boyfriend and the Girlfriend will evaluate whether the action may enter the "Permanent Repertoire," a group of expressions that do not require prior approval or obvious statement of mutual agreement before engaging. Petition may be made to either extend or shorten the Trial Period for a certain expression before its evaluation for the Permanent Repertoire.**

**NOTE: All physical expressions are subject to the following conditions:**

· **All physical expressions are to be performed only in private, unless noted in the chart that the expression is "for possible public view"**

· **Both the Boyfriend and the Girlfriend are healthy and have completed all appropriate hygiene rituals.**

· **There must be mutual and clear agreement before the expression is attempted. The requirement for "clear agreement" is waived if the expression is part of the Permanent Repertoire list.**

Amy was astonished. This was more than she ever expected. Not yet knowing what to say, Amy continued on down to the attached chart.

The chart had quite a few columns. Amy scanned over the column headings. The first column contained the different physical actions. That was followed by two columns titled _"Boyfriend willing?"_ and _"Girlfriend willing?"_. Amy was captivated - there were already many "Yes" notations in the _"Boyfriend willing?"_ column!

The next column was called _"Dates of Trial Period"_. That was followed by _"Times Attempted"_ and the last column _"Permanent Repertoire?"_

Gleefully, Amy began reading down the list of physical expressions. She saw a section on different kinds of casual touches, which included handholding and cuddling. But Amy zeroed in on the section on kissing. Her eyes widened when she saw the list.

_Kisses on the forehead_

_Kisses on the cheek_

_Closed mouth kisses_

_Open mouth kisses_

_Kissing with tongue_

_Kissing the neck and shoulders_

_Kissing reclined_

All these wonderful categories! All just waiting for her "yes" in the _"Girlfriend willing?"_ column to start the Trial Period for them! Because Sheldon had written "yes" for all those items in the _"Boyfriend willing?"_ column! Amy was positively vibrating with excitement.

_Good gracious, there's more!_ Amy saw another short section called _"Advanced Expressions"_. Under this, Sheldon had listed:

_Touching above the waist above clothes_

_Touching above the waist underneath clothing_

He hadn't written a "yes" beside those, but there were still on the list! _That's still a win! He's thinking about it!_

Amy breathed out a deep "oh" and looked up at Sheldon. He was studying her with an unusual intensity. Sheldon said softly, "The list isn't finished. I have been researching and adding to it a bit at a time."

"Perhaps we don't have to have a complete list for now. We can work on the list together, adding to it over time as seems appropriate," suggested Amy shyly.

Sheldon smiled, "Yes, I think that would be suitable."

Amy took her glasses off, leaned over and carefully set them on the table. Then, with a sudden lurch, she launched herself at Sheldon. He caught her with an "oomph" and Amy whispered, "Time to start the Trial Period."

"But, Amy, you haven't authorized in writing…"

Soft lips were pressed against his. But this wasn't like their date night kisses which were quite chaste, close-mouthed, and done in a standing position. Amy was halfway in his lap with her arms around his neck. He didn't have his hands on the side of her hips, either; they were around her back, stroking her gently. And, instead of one long closed mouth kiss, they were giving shorter closed mouth kisses, moving their mouths tenderly and slowly over one another's. _This is really different. This is really nice._

Sheldon realized too that there was such freedom in the current placement of his hands. Slowly, he slid a hand up into Amy's hair. It was as silky as he always imagined and he ran his fingers through her hair again and again, reveling in its softness.

Amy gave a sigh and pulled back, resting her forehead against Sheldon's. "You know, Sheldon," she murmured, "You didn't give me a chance to tell you what I wanted to talk about."

Sheldon jerked up abruptly, suddenly nervous that he had somehow blundered. Amy chuckled. "Don't worry. I came rushing over here from Penny's because I just had to come over and say – I love you."

Sheldon felt a surge of warmth envelop him with those words, filling him from his head to his toes. _Oh my – there really is nothing like hearing that said out loud. She loves me. Why did I ever allow Leonard the opportunity to make me doubt? _

Overwhelmed with emotion, Sheldon grabbed Amy like a drowning man grabs a life preserver. Seating her squarely in his lap, shaking slightly, he exclaimed, "Good Lord, woman – you've made me into such a hippy. Do you have any idea how badly I needed to hear you say that?"

Seizing her face in both hands, Sheldon kissed her with the force of his emotions. No longer was this a slow, sensual dance of lips. Sheldon drove his lips harder into hers, pushing her lips open. He could feel her breath against his face and, to his surprise, it didn't disgust him, but only served to spur him on. _I want to taste her further. I've been exposed to so many germs already – what is a few more?_

Amy was awash in a sea of desire. All she wanted was to stay here, on Sheldon's lap, kissing forever. Just when she thought it couldn't get any better, she felt Sheldon's tongue lightly lick her bottom lip. A surge of longing jolted through her. Amy opened her mouth further, inviting him in, and pressed herself against him harder, wanting to feel as much of him against her as possible.

Sheldon groaned and allowed himself to explore her mouth further. When Amy gave a moan low in her throat, Sheldon tightened his fist in her hair and pulled her head back, exposing her throat. He began kissing his way down her neck. Amy squirmed with delight, grabbing his hair and holding him tightly to her.

When Sheldon reached the juncture of her neck and shoulder, he remembered his "lecture" at the koala enclosure. "_My woman. Mine_," he thought, as he began nipping lightly with his teeth, biting a little harder each time as Amy began to pant.

When Sheldon heard himself growl, "Amy!" he suddenly pulled back, coming to himself and realizing how far he had taken things. He looked at Amy, cool blue eyes meeting warm brown ones, shining with love and desire. Amy's hair was disheveled and her mouth was red and slightly swollen. Sheldon suspected that he looked exactly the same. _What if Leonard and Penny walk in? They are probably outside listening now. This needs to be private._

"Amy…could we go back to my room?"

Amy's eyes widened. She nodded once and stood up, smoothing down her clothing. As they started back to Sheldon's room, Amy smirked. "Sheldon, I thought girls weren't allowed in your room."

Sheldon stopped and thought for a second. He nodded. "Amy, girls aren't allowed in my room. But I think that the woman I love can be."

Amy stopped, absolutely gobsmacked, her mouth hanging open in shock and her heart overflowing with love. Sheldon looked back and sighed. "Now, don't get any ideas, woman. There is paperwork yet to sign and I still need your help pre-sorting my laundry. Look at how late this nonsense has set back my schedule!"

Amy smiled – this was still the Sheldon she knew and loved. As she walked ahead to Sheldon's room, what she didn't see was Sheldon's intense gaze at her backside in her form-fitting skirt or the definite swallow that followed. "_Yes_, thought Sheldon, _it is definitely time to get her approvals in the Appendix. There might be a few items I need to add to the list too. She is indeed a vixen. My Vixen."_

* * *

><p><strong>AN Thank you all for reading and reviewing my first story. I've had a blast writing it and your encouragement has meant the world.****  
><strong>

**If you are disappointed that things didn't go further in the story, please know that I always intended this to remain a rated "T" fiction. I am toying with the idea of trying an "M" fiction that carries this further. It seems to me that, for the first time in the show, a Sheldon interested in sex isn't too OOC anymore. I just need to convince myself that I could write a steamier story well.**

**Finally, I realize that I went against what seems to be the fan fiction standard of having Amy's eyes be green. But everything I've read says that Mayim Bialik's eyes are brown - and I think that that can be a lovely, enchanting color as well.**

**Again - thank you! I look forward to spending more time in TBBT universe with you all.**


End file.
